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The Lost Girl
I feel disconnected.
From friends, from other mothers, from myself.
I dont seem to fit in anywhere, even in my own skin. I see other moms go on play dates or moms nights and I dont fit in there. I’m not in the same place as other moms in my life. I dont have the house, or the career, or the husband. I don’t have the typical life. I’m not complaining about that, I just wish there was more people out there I could relate to.
I’m sad. I try to stay positive but its hard. I have friends, wonderful friends, but Im no ones number 1, the odd man out, the funny girl who makes for good entertainment. I dont get the calls and emails, my phone has less then 10 people in the address book and I send alerts to my phone so I can feel important. Kind of a pathetic confession on my part.
I used to date a lot. Had no problem finding a place to go or someone to go with on a Friday night. I havnt had a date in 2 years, havnt been in a relationship in over 3. I see these moms that go out and date and I just dont understand how. Where are your kids? How do you manage to find a sitter or time to meet someone? Is that normal? Am I just completely off my game now?
I guess Im just feeling a little lost right now. I dont know my place in the world right now. I love who I am now more then ever before and now I dont know where I belong or what I am now.
Woman
Mother
Advocate
What?!
Really… What am I supposed to do? Where do I go from here? Who the hell am I?
Who the hell am I?
